When Good Concubines Go Bad.

So the title of this entry sounds a little "Girls Gone Wild" but I assure you, it's not. My little concubine Connie moved to Chicago less than a week ago. (First off, thank you Momma for giving him the perfect nickname.) I am SO happy to have him back in town. I spent nearly every summer Sunday with James last year and am looking forward to doing it again this summer. Ah the memories.

So back to the concubine going bad. James and I had so much fun on Sunday that we decided to continue the fun into Monday. I had the day off so he and I went and played 3 sets of tennis. aka Connie went wrong. BAD CONCUBINE. She whooped my ass in tennis 6-2, 6-2, 6-0. (I blame the hot guy two courts down for the 6-0 set...where's my ridalin when I need it?)

We are off to play again tomorrow morning at 10am...assuming the rain holds off. He's one heck of a player...i look forward to him running my ass back and forth. I have a league match on Friday so this will be good practice for me.

It's bedtime.

Lillian Fontainne & Lady Lychee Present....

Latest Video Posted

I can't believe I'm posting this. I may even decide to remove it after a few days. Ms. Brost and I caught our infamous act on tape...enjoy while you can! Click the image above this post to view the movie.

Norma Jean & Nair

You know you have good friends when they plan an evil plot against you, and then forewarn you of their strategy. I got a phone call from Tammy Delusian this morning to inform me of his evil plan. He told me the next time he, Ms. Brost & I go out...they are going to slip a couple of Norma Jean's in my drink (aka Ambien) and then NAIR one of my eyebrows out.

I honestly was a little scared by the tone of Tammy's voice. She was WAY TOO EXCITED about this. I could not help but bust into laughter...it was too funny!

(please read this next bit sentence as if you had carrie bradshaw's narrator voice) So that made me wonder...What would I look like with a missing eyebrow?)

Thank you photoshop for allowing me to see this HORRIFIC sight.

Tammy & Ms. Brost.....I would do EVIL EVIL things if this "were" to ever happen!!!!!! FOR THE REST OF OUR LIVES!!!!

Love,
Steve

It's 3 am I must be lonely.

"she says baby
it’s 3 am I must be lonely
when she says baby
well I can’t help but be scared of it all sometimes
says the rain’s gonna wash away I believe it"

So it's 3am and I just got home from work. I am still a bit wired as I had a pretty busy night. I was just sitting out on the back deck watching the rain fall lightly and the lyrics to matchbox 20 entered my head.

I have two softball games in the morning. We play Buck U's and Crew Crush. Afterwards I think we are going to head up to Andersonville for the Midsommer Fest. Here's to looking forward to a good Sunday.

And Monday you ask??? Gay Great America!!!! WATCH OUT!!!

What the HELL is a Hoosier?

So I was chatting with a friend online today, whom we will from now on Call HoosierManKnx, and we got on the topic of sports. While we agreed on one team, the Volunteers, we didn’t really have much else to go with as far as supporting each other’s teams. All was good until HoosierManKnx dissed the Cubs.

This led me to the question in which I’ve asked many many IU fans over the years. While I was on edge a bit with HoosierManKnx’s blow to the cubs…I will be forever greatful for his response to my question.

HoosierManKnx first responded with….”Are you sure you want me to tell you the two stories?” I begged him….i have long been awaiting this answer…I had learned what a Sooner was….and FINALLY…after years of mystery…I have learned what Hoosier is…and it COULD NOT BE BETTER!!!! Now I know why Hoosier fans always “claim they don’t know”

Story #1
< HoosierManKnx > the original settlers of indiana came up through kentucky, settled southern indiana, and of course had a hillbilly drawl
< HoosierManKnx> and they all used to live in log cabins, like miles away from their neighbors
< HoosierManKnx so, when someone knocked at the cabin door, they kentuckians used to say "who's there"...which in their accent sounded like "who's ere"
< HoosierManKnx which became Hoosier

Story #2
back in the pioneer days, people used to be a little rough, you know
< HoosierManKnx and they'd get into fights and whatnot
< HoosierManKnx > well, legend has it that someone pulled out a knife in the heat of the moment, cut off someone's ear...but in the melee, nobody knew who's ear it was
< HoosierManKnx > so, again, in southern indiana speak, it became "who's ear"
< HoosierManKnx> Hoosier

RAGE

So it’s official. I suck at keeping this blog updated. I have started to write several entries but each time something comes up which causes me not to finish. This is going to end today.

Life is GOOD. A lot has happened since my last entry. Probably the biggest of these happenings is that I quit my “real job” at Special Events Management. I had a good time working there and learned a lot. But it was time to move on. I had grown to loathe it. So now I am working full time at XO. Not really what I want to do when I grow up but it will work for the time being. I am having a really good time there and it will allow for the perfect summer.

Speaking of summer, softball is in full swing. I am blessed to be playing with an amazing group of guys this summer. We’re a great team and we are having A BLAST together. We won our first game this weekend. I believe the score was 27-1. After losing close game after close game….it felt really good to have such a strong win. We needed it. And will be getting two more next week! ;)

If not…I think Chad said it best….”At least we’re pretty.”

"Arena"

So leave it to my good friend Ian to provide me with a crazy random Wednesday night last week. He called me last Wednesday afternoon while I was still at work and asked me if he could come over and shoot a scene for a 10 minute movie he was working on. I am a camera whore, and Ian knows this...we were standing in my kitchen shooting before I knew it. GOOD TIMES!!!

Click on the image above to see "Arena".

Opening Day at Wrigley

Wow! It's hard to believe that baseball season is already here. The cubs just had their opening day at Wrigley yesterday as they stomped on the Cards beating them 5-1. Today they came back at the end to beat them 3-2. My oh my how my neighborhood changes with the start of baseball season. I LOVE IT!!!! However, I do not love the parking situation.

I slept a record 16.5 hours last night as I was exhuasted from a week of too much work and too much partying. Last night I took a nap from 7-9pm woke up for a short while to bail out of a pre-bar party and then went back to bed and slept until 11:30am. Unfortunately, in this deep slumber, I forgot that i lose my parking spot during Cubs game. My roomate Tommy and I were in the kitchen sipping on some coffee this morning when we heard a loud knock at the back door. WTF??? Both of us were like...who the f*ck would be knocking on our door at this hour? It was one of the men in charge of parking cars behind our house. He said...welcome back to baseball season! To which i replied....i'm so sorry..i'll be right down to move my car.

It was just after 12 and the game started at 120pm. I was screwed. i somehow managed to find a parking spot one street over on Wilton (Thank God I own a jeep....i can fit into ANY spot) and was back home within 15 minutes. For those of you who know my neighborhood during baseball season...parking can be an hour long job. I thank you Gladys for taking good care of me. (For those of you who don't know...Gladys is the parking God...if you are good to her...she'll be good to you. Kinda like Momma in the musical Chicago.)

And with that...i must get ready for my cocktail shift at X/O. Stop in and see me!

Super Size Me

So I just finished watching the movie SUPER SIZE ME. Wow. I had heard all the hype when it was released but never got around to seeing it, that is until tonight. I'm disgusted. I couldn't have watched the movie at a more perfect time. I've been in a bit of a funk lately, as you may have noticed from the lack of blog entries. And with this "funk", came plenty of fast food. I'm not sure if it was the ease and laziness of picking up fast food or the cheapness and lack of money i've had these past few months that have led me back into the trap of fast food but after watching SUPER SIZE ME... It's about to dramatically come to a halt.

I am very fortunate as for the most part, I eat whatever I want. I would consider myself to be under the average weight for a man of my age and height. For this, I should be thankful. But we can't help but notice our every. I hate the gut I've acquired. It's probably something I'm pretty much destined to always have with me. It's just the way my body is designed. I have gotten myself back into the habit of the gym for the most part this year, but have continued to eat like crap. While I am happy to be the heaviest I've ever been in my life (164lbs), I still dislike the way my body looks. It's time I do something about it. Not just with fast food, but with all of my food in general. I'm lazy. And when you are lazy...it's easy to eat crap. So here’s to being more away of what I stuff down my throat. (I’m still talking about food here.) ;)

So with that said, I am setting a goal. You read it here. If you see me eating the foods below from now through the month of April. PLEASE CALL ME OUT!!! Summer is right around the corner.

#1 - McDonalds (even after a severe hangover)
#2 - A Toffee Almond Bar from Starbucks. (This is going to be tough...but I can manage as long as I still get my coffee)

Let's start out slow. This is going to be a tough one. DAMN I WISH I WOULD HAVE KNOWN THIS MORNING'S TOFFEE ALMOND BAR WAS THE LAST!!!

Harry Potter and the Brokeback Goblet

Broke MAC Mountain

Feliz Aniversário

Need I say more?

Long Overdue

Where do I begin? It’s been way to long since my last posting. I’m not sure what happened. I guess I just fell out of habit. There have been many times when I said “self, you need to include that in your blog” only to let time and the idea slip away. Here I am. Ready to write…with nothing to say. Kinda figures eh?

I am currently sitting on the floor in the international terminal of the o’hare airport waiting for my flight to board. It’s 4:57pm. My flight was supposed to take off at 5:05pm. The board currently reads U5 602 5:45PM St. Petersburg At 5:45p. Kinda makes it look like it’s a 5:45PM flight that is ON TIME. Not so much. But I’m not bitter. Ok, maybe just a little.

For some reason, my mood has plummeted since boarding the train for O’Hare. Perhaps it’s the DARK DARK skies and the massive amounts of wetness. I know what you are thinking….Steve is complaining about something being DARK DARK and WET? And yes….you are right. This is a first.

But I am slowly turning my frown up-side-down. J I’ve got my ipod jammin’ some Ana Carolina in my ears. I have no idea what she is saying as it’s in Portuguese but it’s soothing none-the-less.

I am concerned. This is officially going down as the most boring blog entry yet.

THIS WEEKEND: I am headed to Tampa Bay for a softball tournament. Ms. Brost and I are playing with the Philadelphia Woodys yet again. An amazing weekend is ahead of us. First the first time ever…the forecast calls for SUNNY SKIES!!!! I am still in disbelieve…especially since it’s thunder storming in the skies I see….and apparently the water is turning to ice on the ground. That 80-degree weather couldn’t sound any more appealing. I think this calls for a Tammy style “Da-LISH.”

Oh yeah….And who wants to know why my sleeve has been rolled up? I somehow managed to jack up my arm/shoulder/triceps a few weeks ago….and JUST IN TIME for the softball tournament. Oh yeah…it’s my throwing arm baby! It’s going to make those throws from short to first awfully fun. I’m not quite sure how paintful it’s really going to be as I’ve been resting my arm in hopes of it being back to normal by this weekend. Normal is not going to happen. But I “think” I should be able to play.

Anyway, in addition to the ice, heat and medication….i have been using this stuff called Tiger Balm. If you haven’t heard of it….think of Ben Gay….and multiply the feeling you get when you use that by 756,000. That is Tiger Balm. It’s quite helpful on the pain relief. But has an incredibly potent scent and stains your clothing. So for the last week or so I’ve had my sleeve rolled up at work. Some thought I was sportin’ a new look, some thought I was showing off my slightly larger muscles and others didn’t think anything differently….just a simple “he’s crazy.”

Eu sou muito louco.

Creative Lunch

Ok...so I was feeling like being creative at lunch today so I put together this little slideshow. i think one thing came out of this.....there will be more to come! I wish I could have spent more time on this one.

The photo's are in no particular order.....just a little clip of my last couple of months.

Enjoy!

I Love Kite Flyers!!!!

CRIBS - Chicago

Ian & Steve decide to shoot a random film on a moment's notice! Good times!!! Welcome to Steve's CRIB.

Click on the image to view the film!!!

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It's a Small World

First off. I'd like to announce that this is a double de-virginizing entry for me. (I know what your thinking....there aren't many things left that will de-virginize steve) but it's true. This is my first blog entry made from 30,000 feet, as well as my first entry composed entirely on my crackberry....u can thank Ms. Gina for that one. And if you could see who was sitting next to me on this plane....you'd know there are a few other "firsts" I'd like to try. DA-LISH. (Mom, if you are reading this...this would be one of 6548927 reasons why you don’t want to continue reading this site.

So I can't stop thinking about how small of a world it is. No matter where I go, I always bump into people I know when I travel. Some of you may already know that I had to hop an emergency flight home causing me to arrive at midway by 550am the day before I was supposed to fly home. Caffeine-free I was not in the best mood for flying the friendly skies. Midway could have sucked my friendly sky for all I cared...nobody deserves to fly southwest at 6 in the morning without an ounce of coffee. Nobody deserves to fly southwest during xmas period.

Where was I? Oh yea....so never in my right mind did I expect to see 3 friends aboard my flight to Omaha Nebraska. Last time I saw one of these guys at 6am we were still out dancing!

So I an sitting in the floor waiting for the horrific cattle call of a boarding sw has so kindly gotten me used to (yes, I was on the floor) when I noticed a guy I recognized in front of me. To make a long boring story short....it is the guy who introduced Ms. Brost to her former bf of 5 years. During our talk to girl next to me chimes in to tell me she lives 5 houses north of me and is also from my hometown, Sioux City, Iowa.

I could tell story after story but my all time favorite is this....

I am at the airport in NYC for work with 2 work colleagues. We are picking up our bags from luggage claim and getting ready to grab a cab to Manhattan when a limo driver walks up and offers to take is to the city in style. While this sounds great I notice signs on the wall that say not to do this so I try to weasel our way out of it....the next thing I know I am sitting in a limo with 2 work buddies, and a family of 3. One of my colleagues thinks the young boy with his parents is cute and starts to stare. I smack his leg and remind him that this boy is with his parents. After a few more reminder smacks he stops staring.

As we are going over the bridge into the city I look up to notice the boy staring at me. For fucks sake, I thought. I ignore the stare but of course look again after a few minutes pass to see if he is still looking. At this point the boy says, "is your name steve?". I am baffled and cautiously reply..."Yes". At this point the boy flips over his sidekick phone to reveal a black and white picture of me on his phone.

I swear to god time stopped for at least 30 seconds. Me and both of my friends jaws dropped to the bottom of the limo. The boy then said in a chipper voice "you're my friendster!!!". I still had no clue. ..I was positive I had never met this kid before....finally it clicked. "Ian?" I asked. YES!

I indeed had never met this kid in my life...here is how I became Ians friendster....I moved to Chicago and knew very few people....about the same time Jordan moved to LA and began dating this guy named Eric....well Eric had a friend in Chicago and told Jordan to tell me to IM this guy....uhhhh random party of one? I added Ian to my buddy list and after a week or two finally said hello. Yes it was awkward but Ian is an extremely laid back guy who probably thought nothing of it. He invited me to join friendster and we kept talking about how one day we should hang out.....probably 6 months later we met, in the limo in NYC. Who knew he'd be so quick to introduce me to his parents.

So it is a small world, after all!

Mary Crotchmas!!!

Wishing you a Mary Crotchmas and a Happy New Year!

Hope you all have a wonderful and safe holiday season!

I-O-W-A Iowa all the way!!!

I - O - W -A Iowa All the Way!!!! What the @#$& does that mean??? One of the random songs I learned as a child and can't seem to forget. The sad thing??? That is only the first line of the song....I know the rest...and the sign language to go with it.

So yeah....greetings from Iowa. Home of....well...ME! I am not sure what else is actually FROM FROM here besides Sioux Bee Honey, which I'm not sure I've ever had.

As I'm feeling not so fun and creative tonight.....instead of reading my babble....i will supply you with some not-so-fun facts on Iowa. GET OVER IT!!! At least you didn't have to live here for 18 years!

---Iowa became the 29th state on December 28, 1846.

---Capital City: Des Moines

---Nickname: The Hawkeye State (It sure beats Illinois....the Bottom state. We could have been less fortunate and been named the Browneye state.)

---Iowa Quarter: Nation’s Only Education Quarter (This wins most boring fact of the year award!!!)

---State Flower: Wild Rose

---State Bird: Eastern Goldfinch

---State Tree: Oak

---State Rock: Geode (Is that crackrock because I had to sign a waiver just to purchase a 10pk of Claritin D???)

---State Car: This is not official but I will dub thee as the 13 year old Rose Colored Cadillac I'm driving around town. HOT!!!